Midnight Morgantown Madness, Starring Bill Stewart

BATON ROUGE LA - SEPTEMBER 25: Head coach Bill Stewart of the West Virginia Mountaineers watches a play against the Louisiana State University Tigers at Tiger Stadium on September 25 2010 in Baton Rouge Louisiana. The Tigers defeated the Mountaineers 20-14. (Photo by Chris Graythen/Getty Images)

If you're just waking up and trying to figure out what the hell happened to West Virginia while you were asleep, let's reconstruct what was said on Pittsburgh's 93.7 FM "The Fan" as Monday changed into Tuesday:

Colin Dunlap, who very recently left the Pittsburgh Post-Gazette to tend to infant twins, went on the air to talk about the West Virginia situation with host Chris Mueller. Sunday night, Dunlap (among others) had tweeted about a Benedict Arnold situation that would rock a team in the Big East. Combined with the Smoking Musket suddenly going very sour on everyone, it wasn't hard to figure out which team that was.

Then came the, well, smoking musket from Dunlap on the late night show. All hail Mark Ennis from Big East Coast Bias for tuning in on the Internet to get all this:

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So if all this checks out (which is an important caveat with how this whole affair has been reported so far), there's an approximately 100% chance Bill Stewart is gone. Then the questions start, and there are a lot of them. Does that mean Holgorsen gets the head coaching job straight away? Do any assistant coaches loyal to Stewart immediately leave town, or plan to leave town in December and mentally check out? How do the players react? Do the fans all get in Holgorsen's corner, or demand someone else? Does Oliver Luck get away from this mess scot free, even though this tremendously awkward situation all started with his bizarre decision to make Stewart a lame duck and Holgorsen a coach in waiting? Does RichRod get a phone call, which I would enjoy very much but will never happen?

This turn of events wasn't in the plan when we said USF was going to win the Big East this year... but it certainly doesn't hurt to see the preseason favorite come totally unhinged before fall practice even starts. And really, was this ever going to work? Haven't we learned from Will Muschamp, and Nick Crozier, and Dana Whitaker's dating plan, and Wade Aikman? (H/T to Keeley on that last one.) If you really want someone around, just commit to them. There's a football and life lesson for you all, free of charge.

P.S. There are a lot of funny things about this, unless you're a West Virginia fan of course. But the highlight of the night for me was Dunlap's "What? What did I do?" tweet after he got off the air. TROLL HARD, SIR.

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