Protect Your Unit Game - Week 12 Results (Death and Destruction Edition)

(DISCLAIMER: These picks are for entertainment purposes only. No actual wagering is being performed.)

How was everyone's week?

"GOD DAMN YOU SAN DIEGO STATE" - Kevin, on Saturday night

Kevin was speaking of a parlay that just barely missed cashing when the Aztecs scored a pointless touchdown with 15 seconds to go. But it could have been any number of teams, and it didn't even have to be about fake gambling. Kevin still came out ahead about 20 fake dollars, and I did pretty well (thanks again, EcoKat and horrible SEC referees!) Everyone else lost, mostly big.

Here are the updated Excel results, out "early" this week because the lines are being issued this morning so everyone has time to get their picks in before heading wherever they're headed for Thanksgiving. Hey look, no bloggers in basement jokes! We all have jobs and everything!

• Chris Lane, The Nova Blog: $1,621.36
• Kevin Meacham, The UConn Blog: $1,554.15
• GarySJ, Voodoo Five: $1,175.72
• Chas Rich, Pitt Blather: $1,108.16
• Scott, Bearcats Blog: $1,004.18
• Jamie DeVriend, Voodoo Five: $868.24
• Andrew Porter, The UConn Blog: $695.46
• Hoya Suxa: $292.26
• WVUIE97, The Smoking Musket: $188.62
• Ken DeCelles, Voodoo Five: ELIMINATED

It's starting to look like a two-player race for the championship, although anyone could hit a parlay and jump right back in it at any time. On the other hand, looks like a certain WVU blogger is going to have to move all-in this week. (Bet it on the Backyard Brawl! You know you want to.)

BEST BET: For the second week in a row, Chris gets this for not doing anything. He took a bye and dodged a giant bullet, as his lead over everyone except Kevin got much larger. Nearly everyone has to hit a parlay to catch up to him unless he tanks at the end here.

WORST BET: Just a bonanza of disaster and pain this week, but the obvious pick is anyone who put big money on Oklahoma State at Ames. JOE TESSITORE WAS INVOLVED, YOU FOOLS! NEVER FAKE BET A JOE TESSITORE GAME! IT ENDS WITH YOU COVERED IN BLOOD AND WEEPING.

MOST DEGENERATE BET: Anyone who decided, "Sure, it's safe to lay 7.5 points on Clemson in a night game in Raleigh!" Naturally, Clemson ended up Clemsoning. Honorable mention to myself for deciding to trust Oklahoma in a night game in Waco after they had failed in approximately 10000 straight night road games in the Big XII. (And also Joe Tessitore showed up to that game, too, but I didn't know that at the time.)